I replaced the original with yours already.
More things I'd like to see,
1) Replace "end of donations" with "end of ags donations"
2) Dates (and allocations?) for each snapshot.
3) A better sense that there are LOTS of DACs on the horizon, mentioning a few by name (BitShares LOTTO and BitShares Music in particular).
4) The yellow I would see rather phrased like this, "Every DAC honoring the social consensus (at least 10% to PTS and 10% to AGS holders) is recognized as a BitShares Third Party DAC, which is supported by the BitShares community and core team."
Perhaps others have more suggestions?